Not in the Mood?
Low sex drive is a common concern that I hear from both my male and female clients. At first thought, most people assume that this symptom is either a hormone imbalance or a normal sign of aging. Let’s dive in…
As far as the sex drive decreasing with age, this doesn’t necessarily have to be the case. Just like vision loss, cognition and joint pain, these are signs that the body isn’t getting the support it needs. Although these things tend to be more common as people age, it’s not because of birthdays…it’s because of more years of improper care for the body.
A hormone imbalance can cause low libido as well.
Although…neither of those are the most common causes of low libido.
The 3 most common reasons I see clinically, for low libido are:
- High stress
- Low energy
- Relationship challenges
They are often related to each other…let’s discover what’s going on and most importantly, how to fix it!
First, high stress…this is a big topic so if you’d like to dig deeper, click here. For now, know that stress comes in many forms and sometimes we get so used to it that we don’t even recognize it as a problem. Stress could be in the form of too much exercise or not enough sleep…or the burden of a job that you hate…or the loss of a loved one…or financial challenges. High stress increases the “stress hormone”, cortisol, which tends to lower sexual drive and arousal.1 When you are metaphorically “running from lions” your body is not worried about getting turned on for a hot night of passion. It is worried primarily about survival.
The solutions to reducing stress depends on the cause of the stressors. If you are feeling stress because you are not getting enough sleep, you biggest help, of course, is going to be getting more sleep! If it’s something more emotional (marriage challenge, care giving for aging parents, loss of a loved one), of course, do what you can to support yourself in the situation however you’re able. This could include yoga, deep breathing, meditation, journaling, etc. One thing to note, no matter what the cause, you will always be able to handle stress better if you are hydrated, your nutrition (food and supplements) is on point, and you are well rested. One primary reason for this is that stress depletes several micronutrients in the body.2
Second, low energy…stress alone can drain your energy.3 But also, poor diet, lack of sleep, dehydration and lots of other health conditions can contribute to this symptom. Also, when your energy is low, you’re more likely to eat junk food, which further exacerbates the low energy challenge.4 Bottom line, when you’re tired, sex is often the last thing on your mind.
For low energy, again, you’ll want to consider the cause and address that as specifically as possible. For most people, upgrading the diet, increasing water and getting good sleep makes a big difference in improving energy (and sometimes that alone will help the libido).
Finally…this one can be challenging to face but it may be the most important and likely the most common cause of a low sex drive. If I can just be blunt, from an energetic standpoint, you don’t want to have sex with someone you don’t feel safe with or close to. It’s important to have honest conversations with you partner and get to the bottom of the real issues between you. Is there something that hurt you that you haven’t spoken up about? Is there bitterness? Have you been clear about what you need or want? This is not for the faint of heart. This is the hard work that relationships require. I am not a counselor, but I have seen this exercise help more people than any supplement could! I know this can be challenging but choose a good time and have the hard conversations. If you have something worth fighting for, fight for it!
Regarding supplements, there are some great ones that can help with sexual energy, function and health…things like CircuZyme, Radiant Woman, Performance Cardio+, NZ-Red Velvet Deer Antler and Virility can be great.
However, it’s important to always keep the root cause in mind. For example, if the reason your sex drive is low has to do with high stress, you’d likely get more benefit from habits and supplements that reduce stress such as meditation, more sleep, Epsom salt baths, B vitamins (B5, Complete B, B-12, Max B (2 oz and 8 oz), Phyto Methylate, B6 Ultra), magnesium (Magnesium Powder and Magnesium Buffered), Adaptogen and AdrenaVen, rather than supplements that are more directly related toward “sexual health”.
This might seem like an odd post from me…but it’s not. As a truly holistic doctor (sometimes referred to as a Quantum Doctor), I care about YOU. Not you as a client or you as a “case” or you as a “condition” but YOU as a beautiful and WHOLE person. Thinking about your health from all angles is the only way to get long term optimal health. That means that often, we have to address things like sticky conversations in relationships. They can be hard to have but will always be worth it…because you and your life and your family and your mission are worth leveling up for!
If you need help, don’t wait! NOW is the time to reach out. Call the clinic today and get on the schedule, so you can stop feeling STUCK! 269-204-6525
1. Hamilton LD, Rellini AH, Meston CM. Cortisol, sexual arousal, and affect in response to sexual stimuli. Journal of Sexual Medicine. 2008;5(9). doi:10.1111/j.1743-6109.2008.00922.x
2. Lopresti AL. The Effects of Psychological and Environmental Stress on Micronutrient Concentrations in the Body: A Review of the Evidence. Advances in Nutrition. Published online 2020. doi:10.1093/advances/nmz082
3. Rose DM, Seidler A, Nübling M, et al. Associations of fatigue to work-related stress, mental and physical health in an employed community sample. BMC Psychiatry. 2017;17(1). doi:10.1186/s12888-017-1237-y
4. St-Onge MP. The Role of Sleep Duration in the Regulation of Energy balance: Effects on Energy intakes and Expenditure. Journal of Clinical Sleep Medicine. Published online 2013. doi:10.5664/jcsm.2348
Nothing said or implied in this post is intended to treat, cure, diagnose or prevent any disease. It does not take the place of a qualified health care practitioner and is intended for educational purposes only.