I Forgive You

Powerful words…I forgive you.  Too often we “move on” but don’t really deal with the actual issue and so, naturally, the issue persists under the surface causing all kinds of pain and tension both physically and in relationships.

Forgiveness.  Bitterness.  Grudges.  Whatever you call it…do you understand the impact it may be having on your physical health?  Keep reading…

We know that when we are stressed, burdened, feeling attacked, angry or any other intense, difficult emotion, that we often don’t feel as good, physically.  We often feel heavy, tired, anxious, tense and on edge.  

But did you know that every organ and gland has a corresponding emotion that it specifically impacts?

Anger, bitterness and resentment tend to primarily impact the liver.  A Traditional Chinese Medicine study was able to see this correlation.¹

Food, exercise, sleep, supplements…they’re all important.  But if you have emotions that you have suppressed or unspoken communication (that needs to be delivered), that may be the first step in really transforming your health.

Seek forgiveness, if nothing else, for the health of it-

This can be hard.  But not as hard as the long-term consequences of a broken relationship, a guilty and defensive conscience, high blood pressure, loss of sleep, increased body fat, poor digestion…you get the idea.  

What is your peace of mind worth?

An old puritan writer once wrote, “Bitterness is the poison that you drink, expecting someone else to die.”  

It really does hurt you more than anyone else.  It hurts your mind, body and spirit in more ways than we often realize.

The price you pay is not worth it!

Grant forgiveness (and really mean it)-

A former pastor I had used to share a rhyme about what it means to forgive.  In fairness, it’s cheesy but it’s solid advice and I still remember it today.  “Good thought, hurt you not, gossip never, friends forever.”  Indulge me for a moment to briefly explain.  Here’s the rhyme again with a brief explanation of the commitment that you are making when you tell someone “I forgive you”.  Or at least I believe this is what it should mean.  

Good thought- I will choose not to think ill of you or this situation.  It’s over!

Hurt you not- I will not bring this back up as a weapon to hurt you.  It’s over!

Gossip never- I will not talk about you or this situation to others.  It’s over!

Friends forever- I will actively move toward you and work on the relationship so this can bring us closer, not drive a deeper wedge.

Think for a moment about what your life would look like if you forgave others like this?  And they forgave you like this as well?  Perhaps, world peace!  I’m only kind of joking.

I know this isn’t what I normally write about but lately I have had this conversation with several clients who are losing sleep, experiencing indigestion, feeling anxious and extreme fatigue because of a previous interpersonal conflict that they are ruminating on.  It’s SO important to your health and healing process.  Dwelling on the hurt, pain and revenge, leaves your body constantly in “fight or flight”, making healing extremely unlikely to happen.

What is your next step?

Sometimes the most important thing we need to do for our health isn’t more exercise, a bigger volume of vegetables or stricter sleeping habits…

Is there someone you need to have a crucial conversation with?  

Someone you need to seek forgiveness from?  

Or someone you need to choose to forgive?  

Remember, you forgiving someone doesn’t make what they did right.  It just frees you from the chains of what they did.  It’s healthy, empowering and a move made by big people!  If you have a sticky situation or if you’re not sure how you’d even go about this, be big by getting help.  Strong people get help rather than just getting okay with drowning in the pain.  You are strong.  

You’re not reading this for no reason.  If this helps inspire even one person to mend a broken relationship or get rid of toxic bitterness, I will be thrilled.  Be brave and proceed with boldness!

It could be the missing link that helps you have optimal health like you’ve never felt before.

If you need help with any health concern, we’d love to support you.  At New Hope Health, we recognize you as a WHOLE person.  It’s why I talk and write about things like this.  I get to witness miracles all the time.  Yours could be next.  Reach out today to schedule your initial consultation.  269-204-6525

Reference:

1. Ye J, Cai S, Cheung WM, Tsang HWH. An east meets west approach to the understanding of emotion dysregulation in depression: From perspective to scientific evidence. Front Psychol. 2019. doi:10.3389/fpsyg.2019.00574

Nothing said or implied in this post is intended to treat, cure, diagnose or prevent any disease.  It does not take the place of a qualified health care practitioner and is intended for educational purposes only.